Author: Greg

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Wine Country Century

This ride is one of our must-do events every year. I love it because of the beautiful back roads through vineyards and stands of redwoods, but most of all, something memorable ALWAYS seems to happen. This year’s Wine Country will be remembered for Linda S. getting lost before the lunch stop, Dave searching the lunch stop outhouse for his wedding band, and Lora M. nearly biting Bev when taking a fig bar with her teeth, Most of all, though, I’ll remember it for what I learned.

1. Bev has a second career as an advertising creative, cemented when she gave Nabisco its new tagline for Oreo cookies: “They make you happy on both ends”, referring to their propensity to make you go poop.

2. It’s possible to cut your finger on the edge of a plastic outhouse urinal. How improbable that it would be Lora who discovered this.

3. Marsha carries an earthquake safety kit in her bike’s Bento Box.

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Don’t Shoot Me

Friends come in all shapes, sizes, and types. This one is big enough to lift you with her big heart or kick your ass. I feel better knowing that she’s got both of our backs. And here’s a tip: don’t play paintball with a highly competitive trained shooter. Happy Birthday Tasha!

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Summa Cum Laude

I thought my sister attended California State University at Long Beach. I thought my girlfriend attended University of California, Berkeley. Apparently they both graduated “with highest praise” from Trash Talk U.

Here’s an excerpt from an email within hours of learning that we’d won the Mt. Whitney permit lottery:

Bev,
I heard that you are working up a “PLAN” to make sure you aren’t left behind.  Now that Mt. Whitney is looking like a reality, you better step up your game.  Hahahahaha!!
Sheryl

And the response:
Listen you over there in TN, where our CA weather decided to roost this winter, my plan (proper pronunciation: PLAAAAHHHHNNNNNN) has been derailed by awful weather this winter.  Without warning, the Bay Area became part of the Pacific Northwest and I found myself reading Internet articles such as, “Appropriate Footwear for Winter Deluge” and “Don’t Be S.A.D.: How To Successfully Use Artificial Light To Prevent Seasonal Affect Disorder And The Unnecessary Murder Of Those You Find Irritating.”

By the way, I’m not afraid of your challenge — I have faith in the PLAAAAAAAHHHHHHNNNNNN.  (Please note that I’m not morally opposed to pushing someone off the side of the mountain to make sure I’m not last.)

Take that, you Tennessee Trash Talker!

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Lottery Winners

We hit the lottery! We get to spend the night in Lone Pine, CA; get up in the middle of the night; start hiking at 2am and ascend the Whitney Trail to the highest point in the Lower 48 States (14,494’) and back in one day!

And two members of this bunch are coming from Tennessee to do it. One of them is a blood relative. YES, INSANITY IS HEREDITARY. PERHAPS EVEN CONTAGIOUS.

There were a lot of crazy people that lost out on the lottery…
8,173  Total applications
4,138  Reservations Made (including OURS)
3,667  Applications Not Successful

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47 Seconds

A lot can happen in 47 seconds. Championships are won, natural disasters unleashed, a talent-deficient celebrity goes in and out of rehab. It’s also the amount of time spent stopping to take this photo and a couple of others.

Normally, this wouldn’t be a big deal and those 47 seconds would have come and gone without a thought. But this photo was taken during an organized trail run on Angel Island. At my request. By Bev. Who finished in second place in her age group. By 47 seconds. Crap.

Thus, the title of this photo: Second Place.